Running on Battery Acid Part 2

Written By Monica Page



"Show me the money!" – Jerry Maguire

This should be pretty self-explanatory. Money makes the world go ‘round and even if you want to go de-worm children in Africa you are going to need money. You can go the full-time route, the part-time route, the freelance route, or any other legal version of obtaining money using your skill-set. Not everyone is made for an office 9 to 5, the goal is to find the set-up that is best for you and monetize it. With technology allowing for easy connectivity across the world, it is now easier than ever to take full advantage of the multitude of opportunities available. Just stay legal, don’t try to recreate an episode of The Wire.

"I feel the need—the need for speed!" – Top Gun

Maybe you are one of the kids who have been prepared for life since you were formed in the womb. Not even a carded member of the human race yet and you were already planning your life goals and the paths you will take to get there. With that, there is absolutely no problem with being prepared (although it is creepy) except for the fact that when you get a job and get your life together, what comes next? Would you rather speed through your hopes and expectations or take a breather and enjoy the finer things in life? Perhaps you want to take a couple of months off and backpack through Europe or volunteer overseas. There is no “must-be-accomplished-by-this-date” policy in life. We will all get old, but stressing yourself out to achieve your to-do list before the age of 25 will do nothing but stress you out and make you ridiculously irritable and a pain to be around.

"You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?" – Dirty Harry

Are you glad you went to the University of Miami? Are you glad you survived Hecht and Stanford? Are you glad you stayed 50 feet away from Four Loko (feel free to modify this statement based on your average blood alcohol level between Thursday and Monday)? The goal of graduation is to have the least amount of regrets as possible. You can’t relive those years nor should they be the best times of your life. Yes, this is probably the only time you can be on Ocean Drive for a full 48 hours, intoxicated and not be compared to Paris Hilton; but really do you want to be 40 years old hanging out with college students? Complete your Miami bucket list and have no regrets. Although the $200,000 tuition fee may break you a little inside, you are done and it’s time to move on to life post-dorm life.

"May the Force be with you." – Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope

Not everyone wants to continuously stay on campus post-graduation. For others, you won’t have the opportunity to stay on campus anyway (as in, you are moving away from Miami, not that you are on the UMPD watch list). So take these last moments to soak up as much knowledge as possible from professors, friends and general staff members who can help you move forward in life. Don’t write down every single suggestion someone gives you. There are stupid people in the world and after four years of palm trees and ducks you should be able to distinguish between useless and useful knowledge. As another side note, if your personal Yoda is really passionate about telling you something or making you do something that is only possible to achieve in Miami, it is probably a bad idea. Run for the hills. Yoda needs to give some better advice, otherwise Yoda needs to shut-up.

"Carpe diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary." – Dead Poets Society

To wrap up this mega-post in the voice of Jim Morrison, “this is the end, beautiful friend, the end.” Even for the less than aesthetically pleasing amongst us, these years at Miami will never return again. You can always earn your masters or doctorate degree here, but nothing will be the same. The Rat will be gone, the parrots may be gone, and a crocodile may finally chase off those fat ducks that like to parade up and down Stanford Drive. Calling Canes will have your information and who knows what other changes will occur. Take the however many years you were here and make something out of yourself.

Don’t be the one person in Miami Magazine who has nothing to say for themselves. Buy a stuffed Sebastian, stick it in your car window/ office/ house window/ random areas in life and never forget your years at Miami. Especially for the few of us who will be paying for it for the next 10 years. Every time you send out that monthly check, throw up the U with a little tear in your eyes.

Running on Battery Acid Part 1

Written BY Monica Page



Graduation: that beautiful moment where your $200,000 education is summed up in a handshake with President Shalala in the Bank United Center. It is the moment we all patiently wait for. This is the moment where those 2 a.m., Redbull-sponsored study sessions in Club Richter seem semi-worth it (only a little). After all the toil and hard work you discover a new world: life after Miami. Even if you plan to stay in Miami, life will never be the same.


"I love the smell of napalm in the morning!" – Apocalypse Now

That first morning after graduation: your food will taste different, the sun will shine brighter, and then reality will hit you like a freight train. Student loans, post-grad job, the prospect of grad school, that random DVD you left in your dorm room that UNICCO has probably chucked by now. For some, walking across that stage and getting your diploma will be the highlight of your life for a couple of weeks/months. Now, I’m not comparing life after Miami to Vietnam, but after the keggers and SoBe parties die down and that first bill from “insert-loan-company-here” comes in the mail, not even Marlon Brando can save you.

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." – Gone With The Wind

When you go in for interviews or just general networking meetings the term “University of Miami” will carry a lot of weight. People will have negative impression of how you act and that you can hold your liquor better than a Cajun at Mardi Gras. All the above can be amusing, but you’ll always get that one. The one person who feels that need to inform the world of their Ivy League education sponsored by their great grandfather. You’ll go into meetings and see their pressed Yale blue jackets layered over a Hugo Boss shirt and think, “Why oh why did Miami have to have orange and green as their official colors?!” But when you really think about it, who cares? Miami is a great school in academics, a great school in sports and offers many opportunities students at other schools will never get. Plus, we are ranked number one in Florida so all the other schools can just go back and play in the snow while we study under palm trees.

"Badges? We ain't got no badges! We don't need no badges! I don't have to show you any stinking badges!" – The Treasure of the Sierra Madre

As I said above, Miami graduates can be sometimes be attached to negative stereotypes. We have a general tendency to go into places like we already have the job and act like we are the best. Listen up Miami; sometimes you may need to do a little bit more to get the job. Even if you have a 4.0 through your entire undergraduate career, there is still the prospect that you may need to apply for a specific certificate or program to prove you have knowledge in the area. Take the certification and shut-up, that way you can get hired and run down the hallways throwing up the U to all the other employees (take an extra long stop at the UF and FSU offices).

"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." – Casablanca

Remember that one time on South Beach where you were doing Sake bombs and ended up dancing on top of tables like Jenny from the Block? Yeah, that will probably come back to haunt you. There are people in the world; no one knows where they come from (probably Mars) who remember every little detail of every other person’s life. These are the people who randomly post on your Facebook wall about elementary school kickball injuries that no one has any recollection of. When it comes to life after Miami, have a sit-down with this person. Tell them, “your overall existence will probably hamper any chance I have of getting a proper job, please shut-up until further notice.” As another prerequisite, if you happen to be going out to a networking event or interview, do it 50 miles away from this person and any bartenders/waiters who may have knowledge of your escapades

The Inception of Cover Letter Writing

Written By Monica Page



There are many verified truths in the world: the grass is green, the sky is blue, you gotta fight for your right to party, and almost no one knows how to write a proper cover letter. Either people provide the condensed history of their own personal time, or they write a raving review of their current life progress on Earth. A person with even the smallest amount of attainable common sense is able to realize that both of the above are boring and easily forgotten. Everyone knows they have to do it, they just don’t know how to do it. In that sense, a cover letter is a little bit like Inception: confusion and epic stunts wrapped together in a philosophical look at dreams. So taking advantage of post-Titanic Leonardo DiCaprio, let’s take a complex idea and add in a Christopher Nolan script to make it purely chaotic, but highly entertaining.

An elegant solution for keeping track of reality.

The first step to writing a cover letter requires no more than a heartbeat and the ability to read. All cover letters need to include your contact information and the information of the person in which you are writing to. Using those AP Language context clue skills, this is a letter, meaning that it should be formatted as such. As I stated above, this is the no-brainer section that can only be screwed up if you work to mess it up. Seriously, you need to sit down in a state of pure enlightenment, contort your body into the lotus position and dedicate the next 30 seconds to destroying one of the most basic aspects of life. Instead of me wasting valuable blog time, Google how to write a letter and figure out how to add an address line. If this section confuses you, stop and do not continue; it will only get harder from here and there’s no crying in cover letter writing.

The seed that we planted in this man's mind may change everything.

Introductions are the golden nugget when it comes being first or second on the hiring list. Screw up in the first paragraph and you might as well kiss the opportunity goodbye. This is where you provide basic information concerning what position you are applying for, why you are applying for it and information on the position you have already obtained. With that, you need to actually research what you are applying for. It's beneficial to apply to multiple positions, as long as you are fully aware of everything it entails. This is not your high school English paper; you do not need to drown the person in irrelevant details to extend the length. Just brush the surface of what needs to be conveyed and keep it as brief as possible without sounding like an idiot.

They say we only use a fraction of our brain's true potential. Now that's when we're awake. When we're asleep, we can do almost anything.

If you dedicate yourself to one thing in your cover letter, it should be the middle paragraph. Referred to as the body paragraph by grade-school graduates, this is where you expand upon and elaborate on experiences relevant to the position. This does not mean to convert resume bullet points into fleshed out paragraphs as if the person you are writing to can’t read. Cover letters provide the opportunity to go in-depth into what’s included or not included in your resume. Highlight experience that supports the fact that you are qualified and a good fit for the position. Usually in this section, it is a good idea to focus on one or two main positions and elaborate on that. If you are highly qualified and have lots of experience to include, wait it out to elaborate on in the future interview. Also, you will still be submitting your resume, so the contact person will have a vague idea of what you can off.



You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.

All difficult things come to an end and with a cover letter; it is up to you to end it. State that you are interested and excited about the opportunity and feel as though you and the company/person will mutually benefit from the opportunity. There is no need to re-state the above paragraph in bullet point format. The key goal is to leave on a proper note and move on with your life. Provide contact information (phone and e-mail) and state that you are interested in hearing back from them. Say thank you, sign your name, proofread, print and send out.

You mind telling your subconscious to take it easy?

There comes a time in every person’s life where they need to be told the truth. Whether by a friend, family member or pissed off cat with extended claws, the truth can be painful, but also the best thing that may happen to you. So in relation to a cover letter, if you get to page two, it’s time to shut up. A cover letter should be looked at like an elevator pitch, telling the main points in a limited amount of time. Drowning out the reader in mindless facts is boring. To be perfectly honest, not all employers will even read the cover letter. Most skim the cover letter and resume, and base their decision off the little information they obtain.

The moral of the story is: keep it simple, keep it light, and know when it is time to shut up. Writing a cover letter is not brain science. If you have command of the English language, you can write a cover letter. If you know who you are and what you accomplished, you can convey it in a cover letter. Take a step back, breathe, and just write. Even if the first draft is longer than one page, you can always make it shorter. A cover letter is not the condensed version of Inception, not even the Cliff Notes version. Be calm and get it over with.

Jam Your Way to A Perfect Resume

Written By Thaimi Fina and Samantha Gil

Hello loyal Toppel Peers Blog followers! We are Thaimi Fina and Samantha Gil and we serve as the Toppel Career Center’s Graduate Assistants. If you’ve come in for a resume, cover letter, or personal statement critique during walk-in hours, chances are you’ve had the pleasure of meeting with us (lucky you)! When we’re not busy critiquing students’ professional documents, we enjoy our time at Toppel by jamming to old 90’s classics at our desk. Therefore, we found it thoroughly appropriate to create a blog entry linking useful resume tips to our favorite 90’s hits. So come with us as we embark on a little musical journey to the past:

Oops I did it again! – Britney Spears / Bye Bye Bye – Nsync

So, you spent hours looking on CaneZone last night and found “the one”: your dream job with the perfect company. You quickly browse through your documents, find your latest resume, and send it off in a tizzy. All done! You decide to take a quick glance at the document you just sent and… Oops! You did it again! The biggest resume error we see our students making is forgetting to proofread their document for spelling and grammar mistakes. This is a very simple step in the process but it can make all the difference between making an ideal impression and giving off the vibe that you just don’t care (so put your hands in the air!). Having a spelling or grammar error in your resume is a surefire way to make an employer dismiss your application, stand up, and bust out the classic “Bye Bye Bye” choreography we all remember so well. So do yourself a favor and stop by the Toppel Career Center to meet with one of the lovely Graduate Assistants (that’s us!) who will be happy to help you proofread your documents during walk-in hours.

I Want You Back- Nsync

Often times us GA’s are asked how to properly format certain sections of a resume. Specifically, there seems to be a lot of confusion when it comes to the Experience section as well as Honors and Activities. Well now, we can finally set the record straight. Your experience is the most important section of your resume. In this section you want to have the following:
• The name of the company or organization/ the city, state
• The title of your position within that company or organization/ the dates you worked there (Formatted as follows: beginning month year- end month year)
• A minimum of 2-3 bullets per experience detailing what you did at your job, and more importantly, the skills that you utilized and enhanced in your position
Your Honors and/or Activities section should be much more straightforward. There’s no need to use any dates or descriptions in this portion of your document; simply list the name of the company or organization, and the title of your position in that organization.

For instance, if we wanted to put our position with Toppel under Activities, we might write:
• Toppel Career Center, Graduate Assistant (and 90’s music-jammer)

Now, how do Justin, JC, Lance, Chris, and Joey fit into all of this? Well, the rationale behind not describing your honors and activities is to eliminate clutter on your resume and secure an interview so the employer can learn more about you. You want them to say “I want you back!”

How’s It Gonna Be? – Third Eye Blind / I Want It That Way – Backstreet Boys

So, you finally went to Toppel and met with a fabulous Graduate Assistant (don’t worry, I promise we’re not as full of ourselves in person) who helped you create an impeccable resume. Now you can just send that same old resume to every job posting ever listed on the internet, right? Wrong! Always tailor your resume to the specific job and company you are considering. Start by researching “how’s it gonna be?” What does a typical work day look like for someone in that position? What kinds of skills are necessary for succeeding in that job? Not sure where to find this information? Ask your employer of interest for a job description, detailing exactly what they want in an employee. By researching those skill sets, you can tailor your resume so that it provides employers with exactly what they’re looking for in an applicant. That way, when an employer approaches you singing “I want it that way” in an ever-so-melodic male quintet, you will be perfectly prepared to hand them a unique resume tailored to their specific needs. That being said, be sure to remain honest and not exaggerate your skills (see below for helpful tips from The Spice Girls about how to analyze a job description and avoid the downfalls of being a Wannabe).

Wannabe- Spice Girls

Yo, I’ll tell you what we want, what we really really want….we want you to tell the truth! No matter what position you are applying for, it is important to only list things on your resume that are truthful and accurate. For instance, if you put that you are proficient in Microsoft Excel, don’t be surprised if on your first day on the job they ask you to create tons of charts and develop complicated formulas. For all you know they may have hired you because no one else in the office really knew how to use Excel. This often concerns a lot of students because they feel like they need to make everything “sound good.” In actuality, you probably have a lot more to offer to an employer than you realize. Think about the transferrable skills you’ve gained through your experiences with part-time jobs, internships, and involvement with student organizations. Some of these skills might be communication, time management, organization, leadership, customer service, the ability to work in teams… the list can go on and on. So instead of lying about the skills you don’t have to make yourself seem like a better candidate, elaborate on the skills that you do have and tell them how strong of a candidate you really are. No one wants to hire a “wannabe.”

Helpful hint: Reference the job posting that you are applying for while writing your resume. The skills that company is looking for in an employee should stick out to you. For example, a job posting may read “An ideal candidate will be a senior with demonstrated skills in effective written and oral communication, initiative, focus, organization, and the ability to work with diverse populations. Once you’ve identified these key buzz words, you can better incorporate them into your resume.

Bugaboo- Destiny’s Child

One of the worst things you can do after you send your resume to an employer is continuously bother them to see if they’ve received it. If you consistently call, fax, page, e-mail, and snail mail them asking about the status of your application, there’s a good chance you may be annoying them enough to not seriously consider you. Don’t make them “want to throw their pager out the window, tell MCI (or Verizon for that matter, because I’m fairly certain they bought out MCI) to cut the phone pole”, or even worse, “make them break their lease so they can move!” Waiting two weeks to send a follow up e-mail or phone call is an appropriate amount of time for you to still seem eager about the position, but not like a total pest, or “bugaboo.”

Welcome to Miami – Will Smith

“Welcome to Miami, Bienvenido a Miami.” Capable of understanding both parts of Will’s obnoxiously catchy lyric? Then, that’s a skill worth noting in your resume! Employers greatly value applicants who have some proficiency in another language. But just look at Will; you don’t have to be fluent to throw in some Spanish here and there. Feel free to list things such as “Basic Knowledge of Spanish” or “Conversational Spanish” to give employers an accurate idea of how well-versed you may be in another language.

So now that you’ve revisited these 90’s classics (and spent far too much time reminiscing and watching their YouTube videos), you’re well on your way to creating a fantastic resume! Keep in mind that these are just a few of the many tips to consider while drafting your resume. Stop by the Toppel Career Center for an individualized walk-in resume critique to learn how to take your resume from fantastic to Pretty Fly.

Born This Way: Join the Glee Club!

Written By: Priyanka Surio

Lalalala! Oh can’t you hear the Birds and Bees humming, the smell of spring and summer meshing together, and the blare of Sue’s horn! Nationals are coming up and you have to figure out what you are going to do before someone else takes your place and potentially your title.

As part of the new popular culture phenomenon Glee, people have come to identify with one of the various competing singing groups on the show. Now it is Your Turn to figure out if you are part of the Glee club, a Warbler, or just have that competitive streak in you like Sue and her gang. With all these options and countless people trying to influence your choice, this can turn into a real West Side Story but I Dare you to Move and take action to figure out On ”Your” Own where your passion lies.

How is this going to lend any insight into the workforce, graduate school and life in general? Well for some reason, the American culture is all about classifying people into categories. Exhibit A: The Glee Club.

So what are you? Are you a cutthroat, competitive, Dynamite Sue, a team player Warbler, or a creative spirit pursuing New Directions? Each persona fits in a different category and in your potential career field it is important to merge both your interests with your career so that you find something you truly love to do.

Confused about where to Find Yourself? Looking to the Stars will give you just about as much insight as standing on your head upside down waiting for the answer to fall out in front of you. But not to fear, I hear there’s a New Kid on the Block, Toppel Career Center, that can help lay out the options you have for your future calling in life.

And then a Hero comes along with the strength to carry on..

The Strong test is a comprehensive online career assessment taken at the Toppel Career Center for $10 and an automatic advising appointment with our renown advisors.

TypeFocus is another online assessment that can be accessed via the main Canezone page and is absolutely free for students to take. You can also schedule an appointment to discuss the results with advisors. The results of TypeFocus, center on defining your personality type and broad areas of possible interest.

Welcome to the Old School Paper Based Self Directed Search (SDS) Assessment that will still give you in depth specific results on a potential career field. I knew I wanted to be a doctor but Cardiologist, wow; this test took my interests to a whole new sublevel. This is also free for students along with a follow up appointment as requested.

Looking for a new direction

I am the Dancing Queen/King….Are you the creative artsy individual looking for a new direction, a new adventure to tackle; then it behooves you to explore the majors of Creative Writing, Foreign Language, or Music. Being an interior decorator, graphic designer, animator, or musician would play to your talents.

Want to win the prize? Then Enterprise

Mamma Mia! You are ready to make a statement and get all the attention you can muster with your competitive edge. Majors in Business, Entrepreneurship, Management and Marketing are a perfect suit for you. You will be happiest as an office manager, lawyer, judge, or politician.

Working together to make the world better

Heal the World and Make it a Better Place. Your ideal work environment incorporates people into the equation. You love working with others and are the type of person who would thrive in International Relations, Education, or Psychology. Your preferred career field is a social worker, nurse, teacher, or counselor.

Let’s Get it Started…Visit our website HireaCane and click on the students tab. Look under the Getting Started Tab, what to do with my major and you will unlock Pandora’s Box to a plethora of avenues available for each major.

Regardless of which category you fall under, you were Born this Way and it is time to embrace your interests and match them up with a potential major and career field that you know you can enjoy. All is “Glee” in Love and War, so be prepared to stay tuned to the show and arm yourself with further opportunities in your career field that will grant you both experience and exposure, minus the Paparazzi.

Employment, Mafioso Style

Written By Monica Page



Before we even begin one thing should be made clear: the differentiation between “gangster” and “gangsta.” This post is not about the life and times of 50 Cent or any other rapper with “thug life” tatted on their chest. What we are talking about here is an all-American institution. The movie roles that guarantee Oscars and the life choices that guarantee jail time for tax evasion, not murders or crime. This is the livelihood of Scorsese, the original famous Italians before Jersey Shore made “Guido” a household line. This is the Mafioso guide to employment.

"As far back as I could remember I've always wanted to be a gangster." – Goodfellas

It shouldn’t take a blog post to realize that people perform better when they are doing things they are interested in. If you really want to enter a certain career field, then do it. Of course there will be road blocks and issues in the way before you can actually get there, but the stepping stones will give you the skills to allow you to succeed in your chosen path. Even if you spend time “hovering” around the “career of wonders,” do jobs and activities that can be translated into beneficial work experience that can be tapped into when you fully commit to a career.

“Only don't tell me you're innocent. Because it insults my intelligence and makes me very angry.” – The Godfather

There is a little thing now called a background check. It’s the same as the threats you receive on the first day of school about how there are heavier repercussions for plagiarism than for smacking someone. Don’t lie on your resume. Don’t lie about your past arrests. Don’t even tell a little white lie to outperform your overachieving competitor. This does not mean that you should provide your entire biography to your future employer with every fact about you, but that if they ask a question you should answer it truthfully. This extends to when you actually have the job and screw up something. Don’t try to white it out of your professional career. Just move on.

“Listen to me very carefully. There are three ways of doing things around here: the right way, the wrong way, and the way that *I* do it. You understand?” - Casino

Some people are a little thick when it comes to understanding the English language. If you are hired as an employee that means that you work under someone. To elaborate, you are not the boss. Do not do things the way you feel they should be done just because it is your way. It may be possible that your way is more productive, economical and just generally better than the current practices of the company. The correct thing to do is to make suggestions to your employer concerning workflow and the way things are done. On that end, don’t make changes that have not been authorized. Even if you are given a small congratulatory gesture, you probably highly pissed someone off in the process. Don’t walk alone in dark alleys if you feel the need to professionally embarrass someone.



“I make him an offer he don' refuse. Don' worry. “ – The Godfather II

If you are applying to multiple jobs and receive multiple offers, pick the one you want. Just because an offer may seem irresistible does not mean it is the best fit for you. Being paid more for doing something you generally hate will do nothing but give you a fat bank account and high blood pressure. An offer can be refused when taking into account personal obligations and your own wellbeing. No one wants to be 50 years old complaining in a cubicle. Do something meaningful with your life.

“You can't be half a gangster, Nucky. Not anymore.” – Boardwalk Empire

If you truly want to be successful, fully focus on a goal. It is possible to have many interests and jobs, but one of them needs to be the main goal. Yes it is possible to have a main job and little ventures on the side, but it is just that: a main job plus extras. If something doesn’t look like it will expand into a worthwhile opportunity, perhaps you should put more energy into those that have the potential to grow. This does not mean to tap into the Force and put all your life energy into one specific task like Yoda. Have fun, explore your opportunities, but keep some sense of a goal.

“You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my little friend!” – Scarface

Yes, I am aware Scarface is as far away from the Italian mafia as you can get, but you know what? This is a blog post from the University of Miami and if you thought you were getting through it without at least one Scarface reference, you obviously have never experienced real life. So you know what, you’re going to take this Scarface reference, use it, and you’re going to like it. You are going to write it on a post-it note and it will become your life mantra that you chant every night before bed. Now, back to our regularly scheduled program:

If an employer does not respect you, don’t stay there. Even though we are in a bad economy does not mean that you should lose your sanity and self-respect for a few extra dollars. Look into opportunities that provide motivation and happiness in general. For those who can’t leave their job for whatever reason, confront the people making your life miserable (just not in a back alley or in areas where office supplies become weapons). There is no reason to be depressed in a situation where you will spend most of your waking hours. Outline your grievances and ways things can change to make employment more tolerable. Keep it short, consistent, and non-threatening.

To put it in a nutshell: do what you like, stay in your own lane, and don’t get suckered into things you have no interest in. Life is too short to be depressed and bored. Have fun and be successful, but don’t become anyone’s lapdog in the process. There are a million ways to have employment that is enjoyable, but the above way allows for small mental reminders in the form of Michael Corleone telling you to get your act together and do something with your life.

Advertising Yourself Like a Mad Man

Written By Monica Page



“Never judge a book by its cover.” That’s a lie. The average person forms an opinion upon first impressions before the other person even opens their mouth. We judge people by their attire, their hair and the general way they carry themselves. It can be a bad way to form opinions, but at the end of the day if someone comes in looking disheveled, you will most likely hold this opinion for quite a while. When going in for an interview or even just presenting yourself to someone for the first time, there are more important factors than the words that come out of your mouth. Using the framework of Mad Men, adopting a ‘60s or more classic style to your demeanor can make you look more professional and memorable outside of your mental script.

Dress yourself like a Pete.

Whether you are going to an interview, a networking function, or just generally introducing yourself to another person, the way you dress is the first on the “non-vocal” checklist of importance. It’s a no brainer that professional dress is the international standard when it comes to what to wear, but it is not just black suits and ties. In a show that takes place in an advertising agency, Pete Campbell is the Account Executive that stands out. It's not because he says some of the stupidest lines on the show, nor because he is consistently on the verge of being fired. It is because he is the only character in the office to wear a blue suit. In an endless sea of black suits, Pete stands out in scenes without being a main character. Going for a color that is not the traditional black can make you stand out while still being professional. For men, wearing a suit that is a little lighter than black (light grey, blue or slate) can be paired with a white shirt to look better than the average office uniform. For ladies, being creative is easier with the ability to match blouses that feature color, but still maintain the professional standard.

Carry yourself like a Joan.

Just because you may not be the CEO or department executive, does not mean you need to act like a scared lamb whenever you come in contact with the executive team. Joan Harris plays the office manager, keeping the entire agency running. She does not overstep her superiors, but when it comes to handling things in her own department, she is the one everyone goes to. Being a Joan means being confident enough in your abilities without overstepping your place. Don’t slouch your back or look continuously at the floor. Walk with confidence and command an area where you are the leader. Even if you are just interviewing for a position, getting to the interview stage means the company has taken a liking to you. Go into the interview with confidence that you are the best person for this position. Even before you open your mouth, just have the nonverbal command of confidence and intelligence. If someone looks like they know what they are doing and what they are talking about, it is easier to believe they may actually have the skills to accomplish them.

Present yourself like a Peggy.

Even with confidence, you don’t want to overstate your position or act as if you already have the job. You are in your current position for a reason and although you may have dreams of advancement and moving up in the world, you aren’t there yet. Peggy Olson is the current second in command of the creative side of the Sterling Cooper Draper Price advertising agency. In the series premier, Peggy was the new secretary. By season three she had risen in the ranks step by step. To put it lightly, a Peggy is someone who knows when to talk and when to be quiet. Every time someone looks at you does not mean, “talk to me.” Interject when your opinion is warranted and self edit yourself if the situation becomes sticky. If someone is speaking to you, don’t twiddle your thumbs or make shadow puppets in the dark. Stay alert when you are needed, do the appropriate action of the moment, then shut up.

Visually connect yourself like a Roger.

The single most annoying people in the world are those who look at the floor or walls when people are talking to them. Eye contact shows that you are interested and that you are taking in all the information. The idea isn’t to stare holes into the person’s soul, but to convey enough attention to show that you aren’t just waiting for your turn to speak. Roger Sterling is the head of accounts at Sterling Cooper Draper Price and is most known for going out to client meetings, wining and dining human paychecks. Even if you have nothing to say, looking at the person who is speaking is important and can make or break a conversation. If you want to know the easiest sign that you are on someone’s anger list, just wait for the phrase “are you even listening to me?” Staring into someone’s eyes so long that it looks as if you are trying to command their soul from two feet away will freak people out. Looking at the floor and the birds flying outside will make it seem as if you are disinterested. If you are speaking one-on-one with someone stagger your eye contact moments, looking long enough to show you are paying attention, then direct your focus somewhere else for a split second. If you are in a group, make sure you give eye contact to everyone, giving attention to various people.

Vocalize yourself like a Don.

It may kill your self-confidence, but some people have annoying voices and you may be one of them. Some people have high pitched voices, some people stutter, others have voices so deep it sounds like a car engine, while others can’t speak straight to get their point across. The goal isn’t to change your voice, but to work with what you have in the best way to convey your point. Don Draper, the main character of Mad Men, is known for his booming voice and taking command of a room. He speaks artfully and articulates his points in a way that people will remember him. If you can’t control your voice or the way you speak, you add an entirely new roadblock to making a good impression. You can be reciting Shakespeare, but if your voice is equivalent to a wild banshee, people will hear you speak, but not know what you are saying. You don’t want to create some alter ego to present to people in public, rather just work on your entire self-presentation. Read something and take a good listen to how you articulate words, where your intonations are, which words just don’t come out right. Work with what you have and improve step-by-step, not just for when you are in professional settings, but also for life in general.

With e-mails, resumes, cover letters and other forms of non-direct interaction, you have the potential to set-up a sort of wall between yourself and the person you are speaking with. Even if you are not in the field of business, you can’t hide behind paper forever, and you will eventually need to meet people in person. Think of just walking around, not even in a professional setting, taking in the world around you. “That guy’s clothes don’t match,” “that girl slouches,” and “that guy’s voice is horrible.” We make assumptions about various people without knowing their skills or qualifications. No matter how qualified you may be for a position, if you can’t handle basic human interaction, your quest for professional advancement will be difficult. You don’t need to become a Don Draper to be successful; just be the best you can be on the surface when the resume and education aren’t taken into account.

Interview Fight Club

Written By Monica Page



Fight Club, the nihilistic book and movie based on the problems of the early 2000s became a pop-culture staple as memorable as a pink bar of soap made out of body fat. Tyler Durden became the voice of a generation and introduced America to three important things:

1) Brad Pitt’s abs

2) The idea that you are not a beautiful or unique snowflake

3) The eight rules of Fight Club

Concerning number three, most people are pretty familiar with the first two rules, but the other six seem to get lost between The Narrator writing haikus during work and Marla Singer stealing clothes out of washing machines. Not only are the eight rules great material to quote from in everyday life (try it sometime), they can be manipulated to be beneficial in all kinds of situations. Today, you’re getting the eight rules for a customized, University of Miami Toppel Career Center sponsored Fight Club.

Welcome to Interview Fight Club.

The first rule of Fight Club is: you do not talk about Fight Club.

If you are a member of a real fight club or you go bar dancing on the weekend, the interviewer does not want to hear that. Do not talk about things that are irrelevant to the interview. Although one of your great passions in life may be collecting every color Mardi Gras bead in existence, unless you can tie that into the changing landscape of the New York Stock Exchange and how the amount of alcohol you consume over the weekend is correlated with the rising price of crude oil imports from the Middle East, don’t talk about it. Better yet, don’t even think about it around the time of your interview.

The second rule of Fight Club is: you DO NOT talk about Fight Club!

Welcome to the 21st Century, “talking” now consists of more than over sharing personal information in public. Talking now consists of Facebook postings, tweets, blog postings, and all other forms of online interaction. As much as you think your Facebook is private, it isn’t. Everything is public and nothing is truly deleted. To be on the safe side, just keep your wild, weekend escapades off of Facebook and every other form of social networking in existence.

Third rule of Fight Club: if someone yells "stop!,” goes limp, or taps out, the fight is over.

Most interviewers are polite. If you ramble or say an “um” or “uh” every once and a while, chances are they won’t attack you for it. The problem comes when you reach the end. There are many triggers for ending an interview; some are “have a nice day,” “good seeing you,” “thanks for coming,” etc. When you receive one of these cues, thank the interviewer and leave. Do not try to give a better answer to a question asked 20 minutes ago. The interview is over. Your time is done. Think about what you’re going to have for dinner and the thank you note you need to be sending.

Fourth rule: only two guys to a fight.

As much as you love your friends and family, there is no reason to bring them to an interview. The interviewer does not need to meet your mother, your grandfather, your baby cousin or any other part of your family tree. If you need moral support, bring a Beanie Baby or stress ball, not your five year old cousin. Trust me, nothing good will come of bringing extra people with you. (As a side note, if your moral support is a Beanie Baby leave it in the car. Don’t be weird.)


Fifth rule: one fight at a time, fellas.

You are not Superman, do not schedule five back-to-back interviews. Even if you are fully prepared for each one, with your bullet point answers written on mental sticky notes, you will get tired. Not even Sasha Fierce could go through the mental and physical strain of consistently being “on” in various scenarios. Your best bet is to spread out your interviews throughout various days. If you really need to knock out a lot of consecutive interviews, try to not schedule more than one a day or at least give yourself a couple of hours between each one.

Sixth rule: the fights are bare knuckle. No shirt, no shoes, no weapons.

Disregard this. Be fully dressed in complete business attire. Yes to shirt. Yes to shoes. Ignore the weapons part. Make sure you have multiple copies of your resume and a pen to write down information. Bonus points for putting your things into a portfolio; you can use a folder, but a portfolio looks more put together.

Seventh rule: fights will go on as long as they have to.

It’s a common belief that the longer an interview goes, the more the interviewer likes you. If an interview ends after only five-minutes, something may have gone wrong (whether it was your fault or not). This is not to say that every successful interview lasts 2-hours. If you have thirty minutes for an interview, and you go those full thirty minutes, chances are you made a good impression. Answer questions in full and elaborate on your experience.

And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight.

The most important part of an interview is being prepared. Always research the company and position before going. This does not mean going into the interview and mentioning that you know the company imports its break room coffee from Costa Rica. When gathering background information look for partners of the company, where most employees are recruited from, and more information that is directly related to the position you are interviewing for. Just don’t go overboard and recite your interviewers Twitter timeline back to them in the interview. We’ve already covered the “being creepy” section; don’t return home with a restraining order instead of a job offer. Lastly, have questions prepared and make sure to always be on time.

To be successful in your own “Fight Club training,” Toppel offers two services that are beneficial to your success:

1) If you have attended an Interviewing Skills workshop, you have the option of scheduling a one-hour mock-interview with an advisor. The interview is tailored to the position you are applying to and also provides you the opportunity to have it recorded, so you can look over it later.

2) Mini-mock interviews are 30-minute interviews done with a member of the peer advisor staff. The interviews are less formal and shorter, but still provide a good opportunity to practice.

Whether you believe in the Fight Club rules or not, interviews are an important part of the job search process and require time and preparation. Preparation should begin the minute you confirm the date and time and you should remain prepared until you write the thank you letter at the end. Use every resource available and just be you. Pay attention and in a couple of weeks you can say, “I am Jack’s newly hired employee.”

The Job #Winning Tao of Charlie Sheen

Written By Monica Page


A celebrity meltdown is one of the most demented celebrations our culture is known for. From Britney Spears to Mariah Carey, the general public develops a sort of collective sense of enlightenment when they discover that these worshiped celebrities are just as mentally screwed up as they are. At the top of the “mentally screwed up” pyramid is the 2011 poster child for crazy, Charlie Sheen. Beneath all the television interviews and Twitter rants, it is possible to find some sort of wisdom underneath the quotes. For example, can someone actually use spewed off Sheen nonsense to be productive in ways that do not involve becoming part of Twitter’s trending topics? Can someone actually use Sheen quotes to, let’s say, find a job? Let’s find out.

“I got magic and I got poetry at my fingertips.”

The first part of a successful job hunt is to develop a resume. Your resume needs to be a one-page reflection of who you are and the accomplishments you have achieved thus far. Without meeting you in person, the employer needs to have a quick overview of who you are and what you bring to the table. No one wants to read a poorly formatted demonstration of what you did not do in college. No, you need to get your act together and dazzle the employer before they even meet you. Use all those AP English skills you were supposed to acquire in high school and create the resume version of The Merchant of Venice. Become the Shakespeare of job-hunting documents.

“I don’t sleep. I wait.”

Once you submit your resume to the employer, don’t slack off. Employers are human and can easily throw your resume on a random pile on their desk, never to be seen again. If you don’t hear back a couple of weeks after submitting your resume, send an e-mail or call the company to follow-up and make sure they received your material. At times, they may have never received it, other times, they may have just forgotten. This does not mean to call at 4 a.m. sounding like a drunken –ex wondering why your calls haven’t been returned.

“I’m bi-winning. I win here and I win there.”

There is no guarantee that you are going to get your dream position. Just because you may look perfect for the position in question, it is all up to the employer whether they want you or not. The best bet is to apply to as many positions as possible, increasing your chances of eventually getting something. If you apply to only one position and you don’t get it, your luck is running dry. For those who apply to multiple positions, there is a greater chance of eventually getting at least something rather than putting all your hopes and dreams into one thing and having the world crumble down around you like a melodramatic teen drama. Apply to as many positions as possible, so when the time arises you can choose where you want to go instead of being at the mercy of ignorance.

“I got tiger’s blood. I expose people to my magic.”

When the time comes to go in for an interview, you need to dazzle the employer. Your interview will show the employer your personality and in-person interactions. Many people can write a resume to make themselves look like the best thing in the world, but it is only when you meet face-to-face that your true personality and interactions come out. The idea is not to regurgitate your resume nor speak of events and accomplishments that aren’t even in progress. Be yourself so that if you get the job, the employer is prepared for “you” and not your self-confidence boosting alter ego.

“I don’t believe in rock bottom. Rock bottom is like a fishing term.”

Let’s enter the hypothetical situation where you don’t get the job of your dreams. Nor the other ten you applied to. Nor the last Reese’s at Publix. It’s not the end of the world. Sometimes people become over confident and apply to positions that are way out of their league. This is not to say that you should only apply for positions in which you are over-qualified for, because then you aren’t challenging yourself. Balance your applications so you have a cushion. On one half you have your dream jobs that you have to work hard to achieve; on the other you have the positions in which you have a small sense of “over-qualification,” just so you have a back up.

“Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I could have done with my fire-breathing fists… They picked a fight with a warlock.”

You’re awesome. You aced your interview and got the job of your dreams. Now that you’re employed, don’t screw it up. Don’t get comfortable and slack off before you have even proven yourself. The idea is that, although the employer obviously likes you and has taken the time to take a chance on you, you need to over perform to their expectations. They like you now, but the goal is to make them love you. You want them to wonder how they ever survived without you. You want to become a necessity instead of a placeholder.

“#WINNING!”

Everyone doesn’t send out a resume and get a job on the first try. Some people have to work for it more than others. Just because you don’t get your dream job on the first try doesn’t mean you’ll never get it. Taking a detour to your career may actually be beneficial in the long run. Some people aren’t ready to dive into the career they thought they wanted, while others are prepared from birth. The goal is to go with the flow and just work on advancing little by little until you finally get to the perfect position.

Being a Virtual Intern

Written by Monica Page


The challenge of obtaining an internship in college coincides with the “final boss” fight before entering the real world. Starting at freshman year, students are drowned in statistics and information that can be written out as one or two equations:

1) student + internship + internship = job upon graduation

2) student – internship – internship = living in your mother’s basement upon graduation.

Since most logical students do not have the life goal of living in their mother’s basement, “internship” becomes the golden word for success, achievement, ownership of a bed versus a sleeping bag, etc.

After developing the want for an internship, it can be an easy mission for students to apply to every big company in the region, trying to get that all-star resume addition, the golden bullet point, the holy grail of experience. The problem with that is, every college student on the planet has the exact same idea. Another roadblock in achieving that “picture perfect I’m getting a job the minute I graduate” resume is that not every good opportunity is in a good geographic location. Unless you are from New York City or Los Angeles, chances are it may be a requirement to travel to distant locations to obtain that perfect internship. Although interning with the Coca-Cola Company, Apple or any other Fortune 500 company may seem like the dream opportunity, it may be a better idea to go for an alternative type of internship.

With the Internet, social media and various other forms of technological communication, it is now easier than ever to find an opportunity that best fits your interests. Along those lines, growth in a new type of internship has increased and has become widespread. Virtual interns are students who work remotely with companies (mostly Internet start-ups) along the lines of social media marketing and online content production. The greatest strength of becoming a virtual intern is the benefit of making your own hours and not having to drive to an office. As long as the student has a reliable computer, Internet connection and a working telephone, virtual internships can be a good way to learn more about working remotely.

The downside to this is the disconnect between the student and the employer. Since most of the companies looking for virtual interns are Internet start-ups, the entire “team” may be virtual. Having a traditional internship that involves commuting back-and-forth to work may be a strain on the wallet for gas money, but interns are provided the opportunity of working directly with their supervisors and learning how the company works on the inside. Skype is good for talking to Grandma and getting a visualization of your friends’ “Texts From Last Night,” but when it comes to discussing changes in the company or expectations of what needs to be achieved by a deadline, face-to-face interaction can’t be beat.

Even with the loss of direct human interaction, virtual internships are good for students who want to try something new or are in positions where they do not have the time or cannot commute to companies who offer internships in their major concentration. Obviously virtual internships are good for those in Marketing or Public Relations, who can do their job online through e-mails or through telephone calls. If you’re a Biology major who wants to do a virtual internship with the future goal of becoming a surgeon, you’re probably looking in the wrong area. Majors and careers that require hands-on experience and a supervisor to be readily available need to look more to “traditional internships” where supervisors are there to provide the best mentoring.

If you’re in a field where you will be working with technology and the changing landscape of social media, go for the virtual internship. The opportunity to work remotely will challenge your time management skills and help you become a better communicator with your team and target audience. For others, instead of looking to work virtually, aim at smaller companies that offer internships to get your foot in the door.